i say i’ll be back soon
knowing full well
soon may not be soon
enough
no matter if it’s now
or in your final momentsit is going to break
my heart, i know
i am denying the inevitable
whether or not this is the last time,
i must learn to say goodbye
I can’t tell if
I get sad
on the days that I miss you,
or if
I miss you
on the days when I’m sad.
are you sorry
are you sorry you ever saw me?
do you hate me
for promising i’d never hurt you
and lying?i’ve only shown you new ways to
hurt for the same old reasons
i’ve only made myself someone
you can’t really believe in.
love child of earth and blood
and purpling sky, with
eyes that need only glance
to pry
open doors that have long been
bolted shut.
those eyes
a mix of dirt and blood;
sway me into a
drunken stupor, consume me
with your cabernet eyes.
when did everything die?
when did flowers seep into the
dirt and birds become the sky?
when did the wind become still?
when did it all escape my mind?
when did it all go black and white?
how selfish am I
to live this life,
to see through these eyes,
to want to die?how selfish am I
to laugh with ease
to seek joy when
there is suffering?how selfish am I
to strive to calm
the storm inside?
is it selfish
to survive?
the Turkish coffee cup
shards on the floor
draw blood.that delicate porcelain
holds eighty-two years of life,
wrinkled hands, cardamom
coffee-stained
smiles and desert air;
a shattered mirage on
hard, cold kitchen
tile.a thousand fangs,
they draw blood and make
home in the soles
of my feet.
i have been waiting.
through skin untouched
and sallow love.
i have been waiting;
i believe
it has been for you.could it be
you are a shadow from
my dreams?
your voice,
where have i heard that
tone?
why does it sound so much
like home?
there is something holy
in the lines by
your eyes.
heaven exists in between
your front teeth and the way
your lips become
mine.
there is no room for
perfection
while the sun still shines
and the moon glows–
we remain within
light;
the devil does
not exist here.
take a spoon
to my chest and gather
the seeds;
make a bed
for your sorrows.
i will help you grow
from them,
i promise. i will help you
turn them into flowers.
take these torn
up, gouged
out heart parts.
every cavity of
my being is for you.
Silenticel 