Thinking of Summer

my heart is a mix
of the butterflies that have escaped
my stomach and
too much coffee, and
my mind is growing green grass
by the ocean shore where we’d
go skinny dipping
at night.
the air in my lungs is a shot
of hot summer sand, sunblock,
and newly pollinated flowers
chased by freshly mowed lawns
and sweat.
sweat that slides from my face,
down my spine, and in between my
bikini top.
sweat that slithers down your chest
and pools in your
belly button.
sweat like ocean water,
sweat like tears.
sweat that makes me
shiver.  

Define:

They wrote those dictionaries, you know.
The ones that tell you
who you are – the ones
that you think define you.
Do not believe for one minute
you can be printed
in size 12 font with a semicolon
after your name.
You are the only one who can choose
your phonetics.
You are not Merriam-Webster
definitions.
You are an entire novel,
and you alone are the author.  

What Breaking Sounds Like

Her voice
asks him to stay.

The gravel crunches as
his car drives away
for the last time.

Her knees hit
the bathroom floor
as she silently starts
to pray.

Fighting to wheeze
between sobs.
Gasping because she cannot exhale
all of him and still
breathe.

Struggling to believe that
one day

she’ll want to inhale again.

What Breaking Sounds Like, Pt. 1

Sweet girl, who taught you that you are not worthy of your own love? Don’t you know that once you’ve realized your worth, you are infinite?

don’t let them hide you from your own light

April

it is the most serene
madness. 
the smallest oceans fall
from the sky, 
and the wind extends her arms, inviting 
everything to dance with her.
the rooftops sing
with the skin cells 
of the sea. 
like the bathing earth beneath 
my feet, i am 
saturated with life. 
my layers have clung
together.
i am now one.  

Even When You’re Here

language fails to express
the most profound darknesses of the heart–
the small cracks between the fertile soil of the
soul where only God goes.
There is no one where I am,
seeing through these eyes or
hearing through these ears, or
feeling the darkness in my stomach.
In all that I am,
I am utterly, darkly, alone.