Tag: random

please don’t love me. 
nobody knows better 
than i, 
it will be a waste of time. 
i’d love your eyes more than
any eyes in my life, 
i’d lose myself in them 
for weeks at a time and
wake up hungover in
strange places.

well eyes // a.s.m

i found you
three days after you died.
i walked into your office and
found you hunched over your desk,
your face deteriorating
into your coffee mug.

i picked you up and threw you
over my shoulder.
your knuckles dragged on the sidewalk
the entire walk home.

we wrapped you
in all your favorite scarves and
put you in a coffin
filled with salt-water taffy.
while they sang ‘der voghormia,’ i growled,
and the sky echoed me.

i growled
at your scarves and your
salt-water taffy and your
face. for the first time
in years, you looked peaceful.
i growled and growled until they
started shoveling the dirt in.

the sky boomed on the drive home.
i saw your face in the windshield,
contorted into a sneer, your eyes
glazed over, your nostrils flared.

your face in the ground,
so pale, so silent, so peaceful.
so peaceful.

der voghormia // a.s.m

unless you’ve been there
when the world has knocked
me in the chest and released
the air from my lungs like a loose balloon; 

unless you’ve been there
to kiss away the memories i’ve 
etched into my skin, unless
you know my scars by name;

unless you’ve been there
to simply hold me when 
crying becomes like breathing and
i cannot remember how to laugh; 

unless you’ve been there 
to kiss me in the morning
after i’ve stolen the blankets 
throughout the night; 

unless you’ve been there
to call me the day after 
i couldn’t say a word, unless 
you’ve stayed through dinner
with my family, unless
you’ve stuck around even though
sometimes i scare you shitless;

unless you’ve kissed my forehead
after dining with me in hell, 
do not tell me
you love me.

do not tell me you love me if you haven’t seen the ugly // a.s.m