It’s that much easier for you to suffocate me now that your hands aren’t in mine.

because if i’m not holding your hands then they’re around my neck, and every time you smile without me hurts a little bit

Your intelligence isn’t measured by what you know, but by the questions you ask.

something I learned by observing my friend.

Impossible Equation

in physics class
i learned
the further you fall,
the harder the landing:
F=ma.

i fell
for you at
90 miles per hour
without a parachute.

if the force of your lips
saying you do not love me
is like a thousand hammers
pounding at my heart,
what is the mass of
the empty shell
that remains?

High Impact

thoughts thoughts thoughts
thoughts.
high speed train– sparks
fly off the track.
ruminating, tumbling like
clothes in the
dryer.
but the brakes
are not working
and it ends in
fire.

With each step we pass
Under every patch of grass
A multidimensional web of life
We can’t begin to grasp.

– By my beautiful friend, Sienna Valente-Blough

Night Sweats

these mornings I find
my veins have drained
throughout the night
to create rivers running down my spine.

i’ve been drowning myself
in their cold waters these days, and
i’m starting to wonder
if it’s because part of me hopes
you’ll be swimming in them.

Japanese Cherry Blossom

porcelain skin–
your heart bleeds and
stains you pink.

Scars & Bruises

let me kiss your
black and blues.
let me run my fingers over
your scars and
read them like Braille,
so I can feel where
you’ve been
and what you carry
with you.

let me stare in awe at
the auroras of broken blood vessels
that read me stories each night.
I know the way your
cheeks bloom with roses
when I tell you they are
beautiful.
I know the way your
eyes shyly run away from
mine, but
every piece of art on
your body is a story I want to know
by heart.

Freedom To Believe What They Want You To Believe

they dunked me underwater

long before i could swim.

i was not born

with communion wafers dissolving

on my tongue.

they took my mind and

threw a snake in it.

a slithering snake that snarls

at humanity and

what they have become.

but i will laugh and dance while

i am ripe and still have the

recourse to forget.

motion is the only guarantee:

they’ve not stamped a cross

upon me yet.

Toxic

not like fists and
bruises and whiskey
on your breath. not
darkness in eyes and
screaming.
not poison apples,
but i love you’s–
i love you too much.
i love you because i cannot
love myself.
toxic everything i own
in a pile on your floor,
toxic take all that is mine.
toxic maybe we can share
the burden, too.
toxic take, take, take
all the love
i don’t know how to give
myself.