Memories fade to dreams and dreams disguise themselves as memories; soon I cannot distinguish between the two.
Tag: spilt ink
But if it’s frozen and full of tar, it can never break
When your eyes freeze and turn to ice
I need to run or
I am impaled by your words
like darts—the poison
seeps into my blood stream and
I carry the venom
inside me until it claws at me
from inside my veins, restless
to get out.
So much
venom thickens my blood to tar and
fills the cracks of my heart
with lead,
and the only way to forgive myself for
being cold enough to freeze you, too, is
to let it out.
So when they scratch
and wriggle in my veins,
I cut them loose and
watch the black venom
drip out.
Two In One
I knew the lonely parts of your heart.
They were my campgrounds
when my walls began to burn and
the ash and smoke threatened
to suffocate me beneath my
crumbling ribcage.
When it was winter in my heart,
and my veins became
frozen red rivers,
you always had a fire going
in yours.
I would huddle inside the
crevices between
your atriums and swim in your
bloodstream until I, too, was red
underneath your skin.
I’ve been force-fed I’m sorry‘s so many times I can no longer taste them.
Life’s Not A Cassette
I’m torturing myself trying to rewind a tape that doesn’t exist.
You Break It, You (Don’t) Buy It
I. She was a wide-eyed wonder with
a virgin neck of porcelain.
Her body did not know what it was like
to be dropped on the concrete.
II. You’d put her in your pocket
while you walked, wrapped
in bubble wrap and styrofoam, and
only exposed her
when you needed the time.
But you’d always wrap her up again;
you could never be too careful.
III. All this
wrapping and unwrapping has become
tedious, and your
fingerprints are fogging up her eyes
anyway, so maybe there’s
no point.
IV. You walk with her in your palm; swinging
your arms to
the rhythm of her breath.
She’s covered
in stickers and flower
thorns.
V. She slips from your fingers and
hits the ground.
Shards of her veins
explode on the pavement.
Her eyes glaze over–sticky
with your fingerprints.
Her neck is covered in
blossoming violets and roses
you willed to bloom with
your breath.
Her hands are
cold and cracked.
VI. She is too far
beyond repair,
and all you know how to do
is destroy.
VII.You step on her and
walk away.
Body
The human condition is a sad
one–two
souls long to unite,
their one barrier being themselves.
Sometimes you cannot truly understand words until you’ve seen your footprints in them.
I love you, but…
Since when does
I love you
not mean
I love you?
Since when does it mean
I love you but…
You’renotenoughthere’ssomeone
elseletsjustbe
friendsIthinkIneedsome
space.
Since when have I been
telling myself
I love you, but…
Yourthighsaretoobigyourcheeks
aretoochubbyyourlegsaretoo
shortyourstomach’stoo
flabby.
Since when have I
expected to hear
I love you,
but
be treated like
I love you, but…
How long has love
been a lie?
How long have you been saying
I love you
but
wanting more?
Because
I love you
is not
I love you, but…
I love you
is
you’reperfecttome,Iknowyour
flawsbutstillandwillalways
want you, only you.
I cannot blame you.
You lied to me,
but
I love you.
You Left A Hole
the bottomless realization of
my own emptiness remains long after
I’ve forgotten your face.